Miss Trunchbull

Madeleine's Year 3 afternoon honour Roald Dahl, who the kids have been studying, with performance and song. Here, our hero plays Miss Trunchbull. Recall Trunchbull from Dahl's "Matilda": When Matilda's teacher appeals for Matilda to be moved up in school, the cold and bitter headmistress (pictured) refuses. Miss Trunchbull's treatment of her students border-line child abuse, tossing youngsters out of windows and locking wrongdoers in a closet lined with spikes, called "The Chokey." Trunchbull gets away with it because the stories of her abuse sound too far-fetched for parents to believe. She also tries to exploit students' weaknesses, forcing an overweight Bruce Bogtrotter to eat a gigantic, multi-layered chocolate confection before the entire school - he succeeds, much to her annoyance. Miss Trunchbull stops short of physically beating the children only because it is illegal - she is often frustrated by this. To make matters worse for Matilda, Miss Trunchbull has bought a defective used car from Matilda's father and because of this has developed an irrational hatred for for Matilda.

Madeleine for her part plays a good role (She: "On a scale of one to ten, I was ten nervous") and Sonnet and I in the first row lending our encouragement. Between us and the stage, the other classes march in and we spot Eitan and Eitan's hair: it strikes me that he looks like a stoner. Long and feathered, covering his eyes and uncombed, he slouches alongside his friends and suddenly I have a different view of my growing up boy. Soon he will be dating, as did classmate Charlie Fox who went on a double-date to the movies, chaperoned by Charlie's nanny. Charlie only two years older. Sonnet and I agree: a brave new world awaits.

"Psst! My idea of a perfect school is one in which there are no children... at all."

--Agatha Trunchbull

Rock Slide

Sonnet and I have travelled this road in Glenwood Canyon, pictured, on several occasions visiting her family in Colorado (thank you, Silver). Happily they are fixing the thing before we arrive this summer. It reminds me of the KKH but I guess this the state of US infrastructure nowadays. I recall Sonnet reading "The Red Badge Of Courage" while the kids slept passing this spot on the highway. She was in the passenger's seat.

Christmas Cake

Photo of Toky by Munar Kumar (via David). I do not otherwise know Munar but understand that he is a successful hedge fund manager and travels to Japan. His image captures the strangeness of the world's largest metropolitan economy with 35 million people (source: PricewaterhouseCoopers). NYC, by contrast, has 17 million. To put Tokyo's size into perspective, London the largest city in the world from the 18th century to 1952 when Tokyo surpassed us becoming the world's second city with over two million.

My love affair with Japan formed in the second or third grade when we had a wonderful nanny Taka (my mom remained in contact with Taka until recently). Taka was a gentle soul who patiently taught me some Japanese and was always Katie's and my confidant. Then it seemed perfectly normal to have her in our house, though how strange in reality - this was the 1970s, after all, and being a single Japanese woman in America .. unusual. Taka a member of our family and the real gift she gave me was Godzilla. For several years I dreamed of the green, fire breathing lizard and his pals/enemies King Kong, Mothra, Destoroyan and Rodan, who had claws like Alexander McQueen. The movies strictly pulp but how I loved them. Mandatory trips to San Francisco's Japan-town followed where yours truly spent his allowance on Japanese action figures and comics, all words in Japanese, but so what? There were fabulous photographs of dudes dressed up in monster suits doing battle on top of miniature cities which all seemed very real to me. This my Harry Potter or Manchester United moment.

I have not visited Japan yet I am fascinated by their culture so one day I will. Most Westerners suggest Tokyo a difficult city for outsiders: no English and citizens unhelpful if not racist. Of course I love Bill Murray's "Lost In Translation" but Tokyo only a hint of the film's intended disorientation; really that was about Scarlett and Bill longing for something, mainly each other. Allow me: final exams, junior year at Brown in springtime. I am studying in a deserted brownstone next to Sayles Hall on the main campus. The hours unusual since, well, cramming. I meet a woman doing the same and we hang out for three days and nights, mostly studying but also talking and smoking and looking inside. Nothing physical but oh, the possibility - yes, to be 20 years old. I never saw her again after that. This is what I think when I see this photo of Tokyo city.

Madeleine knocks on the door. Me: "Who is it?"

Madeleine: "Me!"

Me: "What's the secret password?"

Madeleine: "Let me in."

I open the door for her and Sonnet.

Madeleine: "Can you believe I got it the first guess?"

Tuesday Any Day

A quick report: breakfast at The Wolseley with a quant guy on the UBS trading desk. Coffee with Joseph at Starbucks; bus ride home and some work. A bunch of phone calls. It is cold and grey (go figure). Tonight I will go to Emirates to see Arsenal vs. Porto in the Champions League quarter-final with Jueren, whose son plays for KPR. Eitan jealous but sometimes those are the breaks.

On Being An Entrepreneur In England

Desperado the mouse - I know how he feels. Being an entrepreneur difficult anywhere but just try starting something in the UK. Oy vey. In Europe in 2009 in my business 136 funds raised $74 billion, or half by number and capital then 2008. This represents about 30% of all capital raised in '09. European buyout funds raised $37 billion or about half of all funds raised in '09. Real estate accounted for 18% and - here's the rub - venture capital raised $5 billion or 7% of the total, according to industry expert preqin.

In the US, venture fundraising about twice that of Europe or $15 billion in 2009 - levels equal to 1992 levels or way down. So .. less money going to private equity and less to the VC subset, though the US still sponsors many more GPs.

This trickles down to the start-up communities who are, at best, under-valued in Europe. A bad thing given the impact of venture on the economy: According to the NVCA, in the US in 2008 venture capital-backed companies employed over 12 million people while generating $3 trillion in revenue. This is 11% of private sector employment and equal to 21% of US GDP. These datas do not include the "ripple effect," ie, hospitals and corporates better run thanks to email and IT. And so on and so forth.

So back to me: it is no good to dream of starting a company if there is no love. It does not help if exits (IPOs or m and a) far and between+high capital gains taxes which further erodes returns. In short, the Great and the Good (which is not me, dear reader) who do go out on the plank must have the potential of getting rich. Unfortunately in England I have found skepticism, jealousy and regulation - not to mention lousy weather and poor communication. Not surprising I have also found a depressed entrepreneurial spirit. At my age, some or many of my (MBA) peer group should exploit its experiences and networks - if not now, when? By failing to do so, our society loses the limited venture capital to China or India nor releases its best talents. We must choose between being Disney World or a modern world and the first step from up top.

"Let the work of change begin."

--PM Gordon Brown

You've Got The Love

Eitan reads an American book "A Diary Of A Wimpy Kid": "Dear Auntie Lorreta, thank you so much for the awesome pants. How did you know I wanted pants for Christmas? I love the way they look on my legs." Eitan cracks up ("pants," dear reader, is underwear in Britain. And: "All my friends will be so jealous when they learn that I have my very own pants."

Sonnet up and out the door at the crack of dawn, setting the alarm for 8AM in case this "lazy lunker" (as Madeleine would say), moi, is not out of bed. Sonnet, as many of you may know, is taking a five-month work-leave from the V&A to spend time with the kids and me and, most importantly, herself. The museum has been a ten year effort and before that, the Courdault Art Institute which brought us to England in '97. Our transition not easy - me knowing not one person nor suited for the climate - but her strength and guidance has brought us to a wonderful place which educates our children and allows us to live if not thrive. She is deserving of her time.

Me: "Madeleine do you have anything to say for my blog?"

Madeleine: "No."

Me: "How about something better."

Madeleine: "Dad."

KPR V. Target

Eitan this afternoon following his semi-final cup match, which the lads loose to a good team, 3-nil. Eitan says: "I was disappointed" and gives no further commentary, full stop. He now does his home work. The poor kid does not like Sunday evening and, like me, has anxiety before the new week. Or sometimes it is the Blue Meanies. I used to have this especially bad in New York with the responsibility of a new job I did not fully control and found overwhelming. Sunday then, in fact, the worst. Sonnet cheers up the mood by offering "Harry Potter." She knows how to make everybody feel good.

So the football match: KPR plays Target, and we drive to the Cranmore Boys School in West Horsley, Surrey for the action (Eitan: "this is, like, in the middle of no where"). No sat-nav, no-way. It is a beautiful sunny day like we have not had in months but bitterly cold - I wear a down vest and down jacket and stomp my feet to keep warm. The boys anxious and it shows: Robert blocks a cross pass - hand ball! - and Target draws blood on the penalty. Their kids big and fast, and know how to play together using fast-breaks, open pitch and competent passing to keep KPR off-balance. One little dude flicks the ball so adroitly around ours that I think of a movie reel on fast-forward. He is that quick. Eitan is neutralised and while he is able to skirt around individuals, Target's depth wears him down by the time he is near enough for a strike. By half, Target leads 3-0 and our coaches huddle up the boys for a new strategy: "Get in there and play!" (Eitan tells me later). While KPR does not score the second half they stymie Target from increasing their lead; our goalie Maxime makes several heroic saves including a full body stretch parallel to the ground Super Man style. Wills, the sun of a taxi driver and KPR's defensive backbone, delivers several crushing tackles. By game's end, KPR has redeemed some of the first half and rewarded with donuts. The rest of us huddle around and urge the scrum towards the parking lot and warm cars (Eitan and his chums would happily play until sundown). We eat M&M's on the ride home and listen to Aston Villa v. Reading in the FA Cup semi-final.

Eitan: "You know, Dad, every song you sing is awful."

Me: "Some might say it is a good thing that I like to sing."

Eitan: "Some might not have ever heard you sing."

Me: "Oh, says the choir boy."

Eitan:

Green Boots

Eitan shows us his new boots. He is now a size 'four' in juniors. I recall when his feets smaller than my hand. Our favorite flowers vase has the boy's foot imprints from age one month - Katie did this for us when she first met him. So any ways, Eitananticipates his semi-final Cup game in West Horsley or about an hour's drive off the M25. Late game time kicks off at 1:30PM.

We visit Mitch and Rachel and their friends for dinner and wine last night. Camille a costumier for film and has all sorts of table-engaging histoires. We talk about movie sex scenes where the actors tape flesh coloured under-pants over their bits - g-strings apparently do not work since the backside booty crack visible. Only recently, Camille taped a merkin onto Nicole Kidman's patch. Now that is intimacy. And, should you think such scenes sexy, imagine at least 20 (mostly men) on set and maybe four or five takes. For someone like Kidman, who charges over $1 million a day, the pre-takes performed by her 'double' right down to the covering. No time wasted and nothing left to chance. Apparently she and most actors are friendly and professional when it comes to the tape-job.

Mitch and Mike also have good stories - they met at Selfridges dept. store (London's Macy's) straight from college in the Exports and Accounts Department where they issued VAT reclaims. Now all first jobs generally horrible and this one especially offers humorous opportunity. In one instance, Mike informed his colleagues (often ladies at Selfridges for >30 years) that he was an Intuit with certain religious obligations --on a certain day, Mike wore a skull cap and brought a rug to work and told his colleagues and customers that he had to face the North Pole and rock in prayer on the top of every hour. We crack up. This brings back loving absurdities from my summers painting houses in Providence, Rhode Island, which remain some of my favorite treasures today.

Kids have gotten into pop music and we all bust up over the radio song "gotta get that boom-boom-boom" by the Black Eyed Peas.

Munich

I go for a jog following the plane, where we find this enormous cement field in the middle of Munich. I assume I pose on extremely valuable real estate and wonder: why fallow? Of course it is reserved for Oktoberfest which, I am told, sees six million people descend upon the city and 600,000 at once on this spot - the world's largest fairground. Germans and tourists gather inside white tents and drink beer from 10AM until 11PM when the police shut things down. This year the 200th anniversary. The celebration lasts 16 days and, a taxi driver informs me, not unusual for someone to drink more than six litres in a day. Women, he adds, show their tits. Sounds like fun to me.

Our first meeting in offices overlooking this space. We joke, of course, about such convenience - but really it is just the opposite since parking disappears in an instant.

"It feels like a kegger at the psycho ward."

--Wired Magazine on Oktoberfest Etiquette

David

Here is David, who I have been running around with this week. We are at the Paris airport heading for Copenhagen. David my age and investing venture capital for his career. Before HBS he was with start-up UroMed that went public; post business school he ran Forge Ventures which was a joint venture with Mayfield, Enterprise and Johnson & Johnson to buy medical companies. He then became Partner at Hamilton BioVentures, where he produced top-quartile results for the fund he invested and now Correlation Ventures.

A problem with any partnership that an individual might be very good while his colleagues suck (private equity funds usually set up as partnerships - a General Partner or "GP" manages the money while limited partners ("LPs") contribute the capital; they spilt the updside 20%:80%+some management fee to the manager usually around 2% yearly on the dough over the fund life). This phenomena pronounced in venture as 'exits' few, even during good times, and often skewed to one principal in the firm. A bad fund absorbs the winners to repay the LPs and individual success might net .. nothing. Imagine, for instance, you are the guy who invests $50MM of a $200MM fund; your decisions return 4X while the rest of the fund nil. Despite producing $150MM of capital gains you get .. zilch. This not a happy scenario yet not unusual given the industry's awful performance since '00. During this time, too much money concentrated around a few large firms unable to make small bets where the real money is. Nobody gets rich putting >$30MM into a financing which needs a >$500MM exit to get some multiple. Not too many of those going around (yet <$200MM m&a's happening all the time in the United States). Pity the few who are good.

Madeleine on the trumpet as I write - four times a week for ten minutes practice (Sonnet and I sign her recitals). She is harnessing the power and while it might not be exactly music it is something .. good.

Me: "You are really getting into music I see."

Eitan: "Yes, like mom said - cheesy pop music."

Eiffel Tower

Eiffel kept a small office on the tippy top of his edifice. Presumably there was an elevator back then.

The Eiffel Tower, the tallest building in Paris, is the most visited paid monument in the world. Millions ascend it every year, including us with Mary and her crew in '08 (time flies). The thing built for the 1889 World's Fair and the facts: 324 meters tall equal to 81-one stories and the tallest structure in the world until the Chrysler building surpassed it in 1930. Excluding the broadcast antennas, EF the tallest in France until 2004 when the Millau Viaduct surpassed it. Bastards. And while the tower an iron structure, weighing aprox. 10,000 tons, it has a low density weighing less than a cylinder of air occupying the same dimensions as the tower. The walk to the first level over 300 steps, as is the walk from the first to second. The third and highest level is accessible only by lift.

I take this picture shortly before an afternoon meeting from the Trocadero, site of the Palais de Chaillot, in the 16 arrondisement across the Seine from the EF. The first time I was here in '81 with my family visiting Aunte Marcia and Uncle Larry who lived in the 14th near the Bois de Bologne when Larry running a substantial business for Citicorp as an expat.

Me: "Did you practice your trumpet?"

Madeleine: "No. I didn't have time."

Me: "You had time to watch a movie last night."

Madeleine: "Why do you have to be so harsh?"

Eitan (in the car to swimming) "Montrose is the perfect city."

Me: "Yes?"

Eitan: "It is so clean. It is not dirty like Waterloo."

Madeleine: "Or Hammersmith!"

Me:

Eitan: "You would never find a cigarette on the ground."

Madeleine: "Why does Huckleberry Finn smoke a pipe?"

Me:

Rodin

In Paris, I have a few free hours and, since sunny and spring-like, we go to one of my favorite museums. I am reminded of how sensual Rodin's works - pictured. Rodin's sculptures warm and intimate, provocative, nothing like the base materials of his craft -we look at something otherwise a formless marble. I learn that Rodin's older sister Maria died of peritonitis in a convent in 1862. Rodin was anguished and felt guilty because he introduced Maria to an unfaithful suitor. From her death, Rodin turned away from art and briefly joined a Catholic order. Father Eymard recognized Rodin's talent and, sensing his lack of suitability for the order, encouraged him to continue his sculpture. Without the Father, there would be no Thinker. Or Gates Of Hell or The Burghers of Calais. These things often a razor's edge and, just sometimes, we may appreciate a gift to humanity.

Me: "Have you kids ever found any money?"

Madeleine: "Once I found twenty pounds at that hotel."

Eitan: "I found five pounds, a two pound coin, two pounds and a 20p"

Madeleine: "You found 20p? I did not know that."

Eitan: "It's true Madeleine."

Me: "I once found £120 pounds at a cash machine. Somebody left it there."

Madeleine: "Did you steal it?"

Me:

Madeleine: "That must have been sooo nice."

Me: "how many pennies in a dollar?"

Eitan: "100."

Me: "So if I have a quarter, how many pennies in that?"

Eitan: "25."

Me: "And if I subtract a dime from a quarter, how many pennies left?"

Madeleine: "I am never going to understand this American money."

Self Portrait XV

So I start my week with Correlation Ventures in London then the Eurostar to Paris that evening (photo in hotel). Travel takes its toll, so I better believe in the funds I am selling (and investing with) and with Correlation I do. Recall this a group who brings heavy quantiative analysis to VC, which has not been done before yet, we believe, holds promise given the industry's inefficiencies. Anybody who has raised venture capital, as I did with Ezoka.com, knows it is a disruptive if not torturous process (Ezoka was pain-free and I used to say the easiest thing I had ever done though my biggest mistake a piece of shit partner. But that was my decision and my responsibility).

US venture firms raised under $15 billion in 2009 or levels not seen since '92 or '93. 2010 will be lower. Some (most) believe this a good thing: early-stage companies better valued and capital efficient; fewer "copy-cat" businesses formed; fewer bad ideas funded (who can forget justballs.com) and, one would expect, fewer failures and less disruption. Or, as we say: the industry right-sizing. The data shows us the great vintages - where investors make a killing - follow poor fundraising years. 1993-1998, for instance; Bill had '97 fund that did net 6X return to limited partners before Metro PCS went public and valued around $23 billion at its peak in '02. This returned the fund again several fold.

The other thing about venture: human bias messes things up. If the VC does not like the entrepreneur, she is unlikely to invest in the plan no matter how good. Follow-on rounds, which the data tells us a bad bet, account for more than half the capital employed. Why? Investors must justify their Board seat and time; she does not want her investment to fail. She likes the founder and so on and so forth. A better strategy: back a different, better company. There is plenty of selection.

Correlation aims to reduce the emotional drag nil by using the hard-facts. Fund investors raise an eyebrow – remove experience and intuition? Implicity, the belief that only the best VC knows Google when Google a business plan. We think the data knows better. And while this may be so, one clever fellow asks: “will this Jumbo fly?”

In photo, I am in Paris and missing Sonnet and the kids. It is a long week ahead and tomorrow meetings then Copenhagen.

I Will Take You Down

I keep this pinned by my desk (thank you Stan and Silver for sending the best).

Stratos and Vasso over for the afternoon with their children who bond with ours - especially the boys since they both collect "Match Attacks" and sit around trading football cards. Vasso has been at P&G for over 15 years since business school while today she is the Director of Trends and Innovations. She decides, for the company and the fashion industry, what sells in six months, twelve months and five-years. A fascinating job. I wonder if her views held secret and she explains that for a time, they are - competition - but then much of her work spent getting others to accept her vision of the world. Once this probably meant some considerable travel but now technology allows instant, interactive communication. She can "touch" her franchise instantly from London or meet thought leaders online. In any case, she is the one to get it done (an aside: we talk about cat walks, where I have some street cred).

Today the last day of the Winter Olympics and while I have watched none of it, I am sad to see it go. The daily press keeps my interest and the US scores more tin then ever before (Canada sets the standard for Gold medals earned by the hosting country at 13). None of this matters, though, because tonight it is Canada vs. the US'A in ice hockey's Gold medal round. We will watch at Karen and Andrew's - Canucks! Go USA!

I have a busy week ahead with several funds, three cities and an m and a. Go team.

Tommy The Hamster

Madeleine and her pal Marcus and I troop over to the pet shop for another hamster (it is raining). This one named "Tommy." Amazing how a little ball of fur can make our girl so happy. I find her wide-awake at 3AM thinking about her new pet. Walking home, Tommy tries to cut his way out of the box showing two sharp teeth and a pink-nose - this illicits either warmth or shock from the various passer-bys. None can deny Madeleine's enthusiasm. Madeleine freaks out as the hamster creates an escape hole and I note we might have to stop traffic to fetch the critter? She glares, oh boy. We make it home where a shiny Habitrail awaits.

I visit Boots pharmacy and discuss the differences between Talcum Powder and Baby Powder. The chemist notes helpfully that "ladies these days are no longer putting powder on their bits." The difference: Talc is a mineral from a crushed up rock. Baby powder is corn starch (and various perfumes).

Eitan spells out f-u-c-k a d-u-c-k: "Is that a bad word?"

Me: "Ok, get it off your chest. Let's hear your swear words."

Eitan: "Bloody hell! Bitch!"

Madeleine: "that other word that starts with a 'B.'"

Sonnet: "Bastard?"

Madeleine: "That's the one!"

Madeleine dries the dishes: "Should I do that one next?"

Me: "Madeleine, make your own decisions."

Madeleine: "I decide not to do the dishes."

Sonnet nears completion of the seventh and last volume of Harry Potter: "Maybe I'll stop before the last word."

The Arch

What a strange and wonderful monument at the heart of Paris that honors France's fallen soldier, particularly during the Napoleonic Wars. On the inside top, a list of Generals and wars fought; underneath, the tomb of the unknown soldier from World War I. Access is via an underground tunnel, thank goodness, as the circling drivers mad. I see two near collisions while another attempts a dramatic inside-to-outside move that earns little respect: "connard!"

The Arc commissioned in 1806 by Napoleon after Austerlitz - laying the foundation took two years - and completed in 1836 delayed by changing architects and the Bourbon Revolution which stopped things cold. In the end, Napoleon had his satisfaction as his cold dead body passed underneath on December 15, 1840, on its way to the Invalides.

I learn that in '61 JFK and Jacqueline Kennedy paid their respects at the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier, accompanied by President de Gaule. After Kennedy's assassination, Jacqueline Kennedy remembered the Arc de Triomphe's eternal flame and requested an eternal flame be placed next to her husband's grave at Arlington National Cemetery. President de Gaulle went to Washington to attend the state funeral and witnessed Jacqueline Kennedy lighting the eternal flame that was inspired by her visit to France.

So back to London and without fail, rain. I have never lived in a climate like this. England is not like this. We celebrate life with our friends Jan (Dutch) and wife Nes (Turkish) drinking martinis and talking late.

Paris - Omen

I arrive in Paris for the sunset, which falls over a damp cityscape. Yes, rain here too (photo from the WWW, uncredited). The Parisians pay the weather no mind clustered beneath their canapes drinking coffee and smoking cigarettes. 'Tres chic' indeed captures the 8th arrondisement. The men scruffy, still wearing scarves though nearly March, and hairstyles 'messy.' The women own black knee-high boots and black tights. Sometimes a skirt or mini, sometimes not. Dark lipstick.

I have dinner at a bistro and play with my Blackberry and ease-drop - most conversations of work which is not surprising since an easy pre-dinner subject. To my left a handsome fellow and two attractive women put down a fourth who arrives then it is hugs and kisses and red wine. Seems about right.

So here is my insight: the French less narcissistic then us Americans. While the French fascinated with themselves (no doubt - they are French), they are not hell bent on destroying their country. Exhibit A, Healthcare, an omen portending things to come: If Obama unable push through reform - we all agree, including Repubs, healthcare broken and not sustainable as is - then what hope is there for the next three years? Republican stalling and blocking may score political points but at what cost to the Republic? (just the other day conservatives called new MA Senator Scott Brown a Judas and Benedict Arnold for voting for cloture on the Senate jobs bill). Such political opportunism leaves our country with no ability to address China, national debt or Wall Street reform. Who is the real Judas, I wonder?

"I came to Washington to be an independent voice, to put politics aside, and to do everything in my power to help create jobs for Massachusetts families. The Senate jobs bill is not perfect. I wish the tax cuts were deeper and broader, but I am voting for it because it contains measures that will help put people back ...to work. ... I hope for improvements in that process going forward."

--Scott Brown, Senator, MA