Twilight

Me: "Why did you pull the drapes?"
Madeleine: "I'm watching a movie. And you aren't allowed to watch."
Me: "Whatcha watching?"
Madeleine: "Twilight Breaking Dawn.  Now go away."
Me: "Oh, I've totally scene this one."
Madeleine: "Yeah, right dad."
Me: "Yes. This is the one where she's chased by a bunch of wolves."
Madeleine: "Can you go away now?"
Me: "Don't worry, I'll leave if there's any making out."
Madeleine: "Dad!"
Me: "Believe me, I don't want to be next to you if they're kissing."
Madeleine: "Five minutes."
Me:
Madeleine: "Five minutes and you have to leave."
Me: "Deal."