Cor Tenebrarum 28

Everyone, or at least most, has their moment of doubt and I feel nothing less for the Channel. 14 hours is a lot of time to spend in a physical activity dreaming whatever comes to mind and struggling undoubtedly with fatigue and doubt.  Once I start, there is no turning back accepting for the tides or hypothermia.  The rest is mental.

A fair question, then, is why ? A considered answer, why not ? The English Channel is outside my comfort zone at a time (age 57) when the stuff that worries me most is mostly under my control or, at least, I have experienced it before.  We will all be 73 one day or already, Ottis Thaning's age when he set the mark for oldest crosser.  My body is not the limiting factor (says he). 

I have made new friends whose similar journey is inspiring.  The goal itself has given meaning beyond the Channel itself.

But, but, but the Channel - I fear the wide-open space and not seeing the shoreline. The fading-out of sea-light to black beneath my gaze.  My imagination.  Starting in darkness.  The true time of a day.