Thursday, March 3

Hallway, Tate Britain

Madeleine works hard to get out of bed.
Me: "Sometimes life is hard, kid."
Madeleine: "Yeah."
Me: "But then sometimes you get exactly what you want. Can you think of a time when that happened to me?"
Madeleine: "That time when you got the snake?"
Madeleine: "I saw Alex's snake 'Fang' eat a mouse yesterday and there was blood and everything and at the very end when only its tail was left it looked like Fang's tongue."
Me: "That's not exactly what I was thinking."
Madeleine: "Well, what were you thinking then?"
Me: "When you were born, silly."

Madeleine, at breakfast: "Whose eaten the biscuits?"
Me: "Um, that might have been me."
Madeleine: "Dad! You had three of them."
Madeleine: "Can I have one now? Just for fun?"
Me: "You know the answer to that one."
Madeleine takes a biscuit.
Me: "Madeleine put that down right now. I mean it."
Madeleine: "Aw, and you are supposed to be 'Mr Fun Guy.'"