On Being A Teenager

Over breakfast: what do you kids want be like when you are teenagers?

Eitan: "I want to be like Alex Rider" (from the "Alex Rider" series; sort of like the Hardy Boys)

Me: "Why?"

Eitan: "I don't know. Because he's sporty and doesn't take drugs. Plus he is quite calm under pressure. And he is 14."

Madeleine: "I don't ever want to take drugs or go to 'Fat Sam's every day."

Me: "Fat Sam's?"

Madeleine: "The chicken place (in Sheen). It's called 'Sam's' but I call it 'Fat Sam's.' Billy's sisters go there every day."

Me: "Are they fat?"

Eitan: "Uh, y-e-ah."

Sonnet: "Sam's does not count as food."

Me: "Anything else about being a teenager?"

Together: "No."

Eitan: "Are you going to do anything interesting?"

Me: "Do I ever do anything interesting?"

Eitan: "Well, no."

Me: "Not even when I am being goofy?"

Eitan: "That's just being goofy."

Me: "How about when I am telling a story?"

Eitan: "Can we just go?"