van Gogh

After visiting the Van Gogh museum in Amsterdam yesterday, I'm having a coffee when three girls - pictured - dismount to have a cigarette. I would guess they are in their early 20s and very chic and their intensity captures my interest. It is hard not to imagine Madeleine doing the same in her future. Van Gogh created one of my favorite paintings "Still Live, Vase With Twelve Sunflowers" despite being one unhappy dude. I did not appreciate that van Gogh tried to found a Utopian art colony from his home in Arles - a house without plumbing. He must have been lonely made worse by the failure of his vision. Van Gogh was aware of his mental illness and committed himself to an institution several times - afraid of his breakdowns (diagnoses include schizophrenia, bipolar disorder, syphilis, poisoning from swallowed paints, temporal lobe epilepsy and acute intermittent porphyria+malnutrition, overwork, insomnia, alcohol, and absinthe in particular). He killed himself at 35, which given the volume of work he produced is hard to imagine. In fact, his last painting "Wheat Field With Crows" was completed two weeks before his death and his attempt to convey his gloom.